I’m staring at a blank screen, unsure what to type, knowing that writing something about this is likely to help me close this chapter and move on in a healthy way. It’s unexpectedly difficult to know where to start, and I’m sure this won’t be my best writing.
My partner had Juno before he had me. She supported him through his most recent breakup, and kept him company when he was alone. She was there the first time I went to his apartment. He tried to get her to jump up in my lap, but I was wearing jean shorts and she scratched my thigh. At the time, I thought it might scar… now I’m a little sad it didn’t.
She accepted me as part of her life right away. She helped raise my dog, Eos, who I brought to her as a puppy. When my family lived with us, they brought home cats and Juno shared her favorite napping spots and even her water bowl with them. When they moved out, they got a little chihuahua mix and Juno got extremely excited to play with him whenever they brought him over.
Then, there were the children. She loved them all. She preferentially slept on their things and they cuddled with her on the floor or on the couch. I don’t know if any of them remember life before she was around, and Cub came home from the hospital to a home she already occupied.
Almost nine years of my life were improved by Juno.
Tuesday, May 5, 2020 – Juno collapsed and went to the vet, where we found out she was seriously anemic. Subsequently, she was given a blood transfusion and was subject to a series of tests to ultimately determine that her anemia was not caused by any identifiable, treatable issue. They called it immune-mediated hemolytic anemia. Her immune system was destroying her own red blood cells. She was on a cocktail of medications to boost her cell production, suppress her immune system, and settle her stomach so she would still eat in spite of all of the drugs.
We were optimistic.
Friday, June 12, 2020 – We go on a short backpacking trip into the wilderness and spend the weekend camping by a beautiful river. Aside from the mosquitoes, it’s pretty wonderful. Juno handles the hike just fine and shares a tent with Eos and Cub.
Friday, July 3, 2020 – Her blood cell count is back up to normal. The vet recommended that we decrease her steroid dosage, because it would be best for her if we could get her off of it and still maintain her cell levels. We slowly work her back, week by week, and through the whole process, she seems fine.
Saturday, July 18, 2020 – We go car camping with our best-friend-family on some BLM land to the southwest. Juno loves it. She wanders with us and soaks up a ton of attention from all of the kids. She shares a tent with Eos and Cub. We all get to see the NEOWISE comet. It’s pretty magical.
Saturday, July 25, 2020 – Within days of discontinuing the prednisone, Juno faints again. Her count is back down to 28%. The vet gives her a steroid shot and prescribes prednisone again.
We’re hopeful.
Monday, July 27, 2020 – She faints again. Her count is down to 18%. The vet suggests we try one more day with prednisone since we’re hesitant to try another blood transfusion or hospitalization. She wasted away considerably last time we did that.
We have a barbecue with our best-friend-family. We had planned it weeks in advance, and I’m glad we did. Juno enjoyed having friends over. She couldn’t chase squirrels, but I know she loved the attention and watching the kids play. She fainted multiple times, and we did our best to keep her laying down.
I made her boiled chicken because she wouldn’t eat her kibble.
We worried.
Tuesday, July 28, 2020 – We made the choice to put Juno down.
Taking her off of the prednisone allowed her blood cell count to crash again, and reintroducing it didn’t reverse the process. We couldn’t hold on to her any longer.
We cried.
Today, we received her ashes.
We cried again.
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